What Does An Abuser Look Like?
What Peace Lutheran Church Is Doing
What You Can Do
Child Safety Governing Policy Training
Materials
Bob sat
dejectedly before the church board. His
broad shoulders slumped as he tearfully retold his story. Bob has been sexually molesting his thirteen
year old daughter for the last two years. This activity may have gone undetected except that Bob tried
to abuse one of his daughter's girlfriends while chaperoning a Sunday School
activity. The young girl reported
the incident to her parents and Bob was apprehended. The church leaders hearing this confession sat in disbelief. How
could Bob, a successful businessman, husband, father of three children,
and respected church worker commit such actions?
Sexual abuse
of children is a terrible reality of the world we live in. The church is not immune to this reality. At
Peace Lutheran Church we want to provide a safe environment for all children
and those who work with them. Those
who work directly with children and supervise other volunteers play an important
role in helping prevent child sexual abuse from occurring. This guide is designed to provide some basic training for
key church workers. The training
will help workers avoid high risk situations, competently supervise volunteers,
be aware of basic sexual abuse symptoms, and be aware of what to do when
a suspected case of child sexual abuse is reported.
What Is Child Sexual Abuse?
Sexual abuse
in general includes any form of sexual contact or exploitation in which a
minor is being used for the sexual stimulation of the perpetrator.
Sexual abuse
of children may be violent or nonviolent. All child sexual abuse is an exploitation of a child's vulnerability
and powerlessness in which the abuser is fully responsible for the actions.
Sexual abuse
of children is criminal behavior that involves children in sexual behaviors
as defined by state and federal law.
Sexual abuse
of children includes behaviors that involve touching and non-touching aspects.
Types of
abuse that involve touching include but are not limited to:
Types of
abuse that do not involve touching include but are not limited to:
What Does A Child Sexual Abuser Look Like?
Who is the
typical child sexual abuser? Some
church leaders assume that abusers are "strangers wearing trench coats" or
"dirty old men." These
stereotypes are not only inaccurate but dangerously contribute to a false
sense of security. Researchers
in the field of child sexual abuse currently indicate that no one profile
fits the various perpetrators of abuse. Church
leaders can become preoccupied screening stereotypes, while not suspecting
the real molester could be an active adult or teen in the church.
Symptoms Of Child Sexual Abuse
Church workers
should be alert to physical signs of sexual abuse and molestation, as well
as to behavioral and verbal signs that a victim may exhibit. Some of the more common signs are listed
below.
Physical
signs may include:
Behavioral
signs may include:
Verbal signs
may include the following statements:
What Peace Lutheran
Church Is Doing
To protect
our children and those who work with them Peace Lutheran Church created and
adopted the Child Safety Governing Policy. This policy established worker screening, the two adult rule,
windows on doors, child safety as part of new member orientation, ongoing
review, and these worker training materials.
What You Can Do
As an adult
volunteer or employee at Peace Lutheran Church you are an essential part
of this church's efforts to provide a safe environment for our children. The effectiveness of the child safety
efforts in our congregation is reliant upon your own awareness and understanding
of child safety concerns.
The Child
Safety Governing Policy should not be viewed as something which restricts
the way you can do ministry but rather it should be viewed as a resource
to support your efforts in carrying out your ministry in a safe manner. It also provides you with a reasonable
amount of personal protection from false accusations.
There are
several "red flags" you can watch for that might be indicative of a problem. Watch
for the symptoms of sexual abuse as they are identified on the previous page
of these materials. Avoid stereotyping
who might be a potential abuser when selecting volunteers. An adult who seems gifted and eager to
work with children could be an abuser. Identify
and eliminate situations that might put you or other workers in high risk
situations whenever possible.
As an adult,
it is your responsibility to notify the Senior Pastor or Parish Relations
Ministry Chairperson if you feel a children's event will place adults in
potentially high risk situations with children. This will initiate the process of screening the adults who
will be participating in the event.
When an allegation
of abuse is made directly to you by either a child or another worker you
must respond. If another worker
notifies you of an allegation, encourage the worker who received the report
directly from the child to contact the appropriate authorities. If that person is not willing to do so
then it becomes your responsibility to make the report.
It is important
to understand that as an employee or volunteer with children you are empowered
to use your own best judgment when it comes to the safety of our children,
yourself and others who work with children. Although you are required to follow the procedures outlined
in the Child Safety Governing Policy there will most certainly be situations
that are not covered by any particular procedure. It is at these times that you must use reasonable judgment
to discern what the best action to take is. Listen to your "gut feelings". If something does not seem right, do not hesitate to share
your concern with another adult worker or change the situation.
Portions
of these Training Materials were taken from Reducing the Risk of Child
Sexual Abuse in Your Church, Church Law & Tax Report, 1993.